2018 Reflections

So much has transpired in my life and heart this year; from several milestones occurring to deeper understanding of who God is and who I am in Him.

Nicole graduated high school and lived in Reno from the end of June until Thanksgiving; Michael and Matt both became engaged, and Jon received his driver’s permit. Upon reflection, much of our time here in California up to this point has been a season of many milestones. It seems like I can hardly catch my breath-high school and college graduations, becoming a MOM (Mom Of a Marine), engagements, marriage, divorce and marriage again!

Spiritually, a separate post or two is necessary to address all the Lord has done during this season! I will share some of the most recent lessons he has taught me. I recently finished my first bible study with Jen Wilkin on Genesis 1-11 (God of Creation). Obedience is the overarching lesson the Lord showed me during this study; from Eve believing that she knew better than God (Gen 3:2-3), to Cain, angry because his sacrifice was not acceptable to God (Gen 4: 3-7), to the wickedness of man, resulting in the Lord regretting he made man (Gen 6: 5-7), God’s heart was  grieved because his people did not obey Him.

I know I have grieved God’s heart before and I have repented for that. Since sanctification is a life-long process, I know I will have need in the future to again repent. Yet, I am hopeful those occurrences will grow further apart in time. Rebellion hurts not only God , but also me and those around me. We do not live in a bubble and we are created for relationship- first and foremost with God, and next with the people he places  in our life- our family of origin, spouse, children, friends and co-workers.

My life has been greatly enriched the past ten weeks since my niece gave birth to her fourth baby, who I affectionately refer to as Peanut since he was sic pounds eight ounces at birth. I am blessed to not have to work outside the home- thank you God and Hon. Having received my marching orders last year about being available, I have started caring for three sweet knuckleheads, as their dad lovingly refers to them, twice a week. On Tuesdays, I drive to my niece’s and hang out for the day.

This past Tuesday Peanut’s siblings were performing their holiday program at school. I was SO excited to see them, but on Monday I received a call from a friend. Her mom was in the hospital and she was asking if I knew any college students who could sit with her mom on Tuesday for a few hours. Immediately, I knew I was being presented with an opportunity to obey the Lord’s leading...or not.  I told my friend I would sit with her mom. On Tuesday, rather than spend the day watching the kids perform, I sat with a precious woman who was not well, having lost her husband of over fifty years only two months ago. I read scripture to her and told her some of the things her daughter and I had recently done.  I left a bit after noon and returned home, squeezing in a short twenty minute nap before facing the rest of the day. I think of my Hawaii pastor’s words, “Walk in God’s will, God’s way by reading God’s word; what happens when we are sitting under the fountain of God’s will? There are both blessings and blasting-which do you choose?” All that to say obedience matters to God so it ought to matter to us.

On a lighter note, I have come to appreciate laughter more this year. Part of it stems from hanging around with fun, funny people like Traci, Kathy and Steph. Part of it is a result of the way I do life-fast, with purpose and much...passion, and humor. I crack myself up and over the past few years I have thought about recording myself and sharing somehow. I took the plunge into the world of You Tube in November, much to the chagrin of some of my family members (who shudder at the notion their midlife mom may act in an embarrassing manner ☺️). You can find me at #Reallifemidlifemom.
With so much heaviness in the world, laughter has become one of God’s most fun blessings in my day.

I challenge you to reflect on what you have learned this year. Feel free to post in the comments, and if I can figure out how to find the after I post this, I will happily read and respond.

Blessed to be a blessing,
Pattie

Friendship

Having recently been blessed with precious time with sweet friends from near and far, friendship is on my mind.

You've got troubles, and I've got 'em too
There isn't anything I wouldn't do for you
We stick together and can see it through
'Cause you've got a friend in me
You've got a friend in me-Randy Newman

This stanza captures the essence of friendship-trust, dependability, companionship

What a blessing to have that person who gets you- who knows what you're thinking sometimes before you even say your thought aloud; who prays for you, gently speaks truth even if it's hard, and who laughs until you cry (or emit any other fluids)!

How sweet of our Lord to create us for relationship-first and foremost with Him as well as with others including spouse, children and friends.

As with other aspects of life, friendship involves variations- in ease, degree, and intimacy.  Which friendships in your life are easy; in the sense that you connect on many levels, share interests or beliefs, or spend time together without conflict or much effort? Who is the person you spend time with, talking, texting and doing life? Who is the person who knows you- the good, the not-so-good and the ugly?

True friendship stands the test of time and trials. I recently spent the weekend with two gals from my childhood, both of whom were in my wedding. We laughed lots and reminisced about our shared memories. We have also been there for one another through life's bumps including skin cancer, divorce, and the death of a parent.

The degree of intimacy shared with a friend is by no means limited to how long one has known the person. I walk with a gal who has become a confidant although we have only know each other two years. I would describe both of us as authentic, not much pretense, as well as committed to our shared faith.We talk about the relational challenges we face. I can count on her to point me to Jesus first and foremost, and to challenge me to how I can more effectively handle a situation with grace and love. 

The decisive test and the most beautiful proof of real friendship will be found in the day of adversity. A friend is never known till needed. When calamity falls upon us, false friends make excuses and go; lip-friends relapse into silence; but we begin then for the first time to find out who is a friend indeed. Then it appears that the true friend is entirely unchanged by the changed aspect of affairs; it seems as if he had been born into a brotherhood with us for this express occasion. 1

Are you blessed with the gift of friendship? In what ways can you further develop your current friendships or seek out new ones? 

Pattie, a gal blessed with an abundance of friends

1 biblehub.com

Are You Available?

Always a challenge where to start when much time has passed since my last post.

In the past year much has occurred in the Ceci household; children have married/divorced, deployed, graduated, traveled, become gainfully employed as contributing citizens and spent time in Canada working at a horse ranch.

The Lord has kindly shown and grown me during the past year as well. I am impatient-no getting around it. I believe it became most apparent while I waited in line at Newport Beach to use the restroom. It was a busy, summer Saturday night and the line was LONG and I needed to use the facilities. I grumbled and complained, "I don't understand why it takes ladies so long to do their thing; just get in there, pee and be done. Ugghh!" Couple this with standing in line a few times at the express lane at the grocery store, wondering why it takes sooo long to ring up fifteen or less items. I realized these incidences paralleled my spiritual journey.

Since entering this new season of "retirement," I have asked, prayed and grumbled to the Lord, "What would you have me do, Lord?" I expected, I guess, for Him to answer-on my terms, in my timing. How brash of me! We serve a merciful Lord and he is faithful to love and embrace us, shortcomings and all. I can now say that I know my current assignment and I embrace it wholeheartedly.

My nature tends to be somewhat organized and I like to have a plan, knowing what each day brings (ahead of time). Well, isn't it like God to grow me in this area? I cannot pinpoint an exact moment or experience this was revealed to me, but what I know is the Lord wants me to be available. Period.

I have wondered aloud, "Maybe I should work at Trader Joe's." I love people; it's active and it's nearby. No, I do not believe that is for me at this time. A few opportunities have presented themselves and they are in line with how the Lord has made me. I help out at MOPs every other Friday in the nursery, which I love. I volunteer at CHOC on Mondays in patient hospitality and the Lord has blessed me with a twenty-one year old gal as my partner each week. We discharge patients, bring parents coffee, and buddy with children when needed. Once a month I bring Kopi there as a pet therapy dog and the staff, parents and patients love him.

More than anything I love encouraging moms in their most important calling and I am thrilled to say the Lord has given me the desire of my heart. It looks different then it did in Hawaii. Rather than meeting weekly with a group of moms, sharing, praying and discussing all thing related to motherhood, he has placed moms in my path on a more one-on-one basis.

Being available has also resulted in unplanned opportunities to serve or bless others. I can help a single mom move into her new apartment or invite a mom over with her little ones to swim. One time I had planned coffee with someone but it did not pan out that day. When I went to the gym that morning a gal asked if I could bake cookies for the upcoming CHOC walk. Now I knew why I did not have plans for that day. I had cookies to bake.

Having a daily quiet time was not a challenge for me as a busy mom of five children. Yet, I have struggled with keeping this discipline, in spite of having more free time than I have had in several years. A favorite pastor of mine says, "How much of God do we have in our lives? Exactly as much as we desire!" I was convicted gently that this is necessary not optional!" Seven days without God makes one" weak," is another Waxerism.

I aim to remain consistent without becoming legalistic in regards to this life-giving discipline. I find I talk with the Lord throughout the day when people, burdens and situations come to mind. Playing worship music while at home or driving helps my mind focus on that which is most important rather than raising my blood pressure listening to talk radio.

I will end with one more saying from Pastor Waxer- "God cares more about your availability than your ability." My challenge-are you willing and able to surrender your agenda for the Lord's?

A Lot Happens in a Year

Hmm.. Where to start? Sleep challenges due to my uh, current "season" of life? Emotional ups and downs as life's milestones have been grouped together so closely? 

Having emerged from it, I realize I was in a funk from the time Michael and Matt graduated high school until about February. Granted, four children still live with us. However, my role as homeschool mom has been decreasing since moving to California. In September, Matt started college and Michael was pursuing his dream of becoming a US Marine. That left poor Jon home with me, "encouraging" him to complete his school work (or nagging as he would say).
  
I began to pray, asking the Lord to direct my steps and open doors for me to serve him in new ways. I believe I thought   the path would be clear and linear. Unsurprisingly, it was
neither.

 1 Kings 19:12 says, "And after the earthquake a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire.  And after the fire the sound of a low whisper." Sitting still is challenging for me, but I am learning the discipline of praying and listening to my Lord (Ps 46:10).
As I searched online for volunteer opportunities, I came across CHOC hospital. While searching their website, I happened upon pet therapy as an opportunity. What a great idea! 

 Kopi is our almost two-year old Double-Doodle, a mix of Goldendoodle and Labradoodle. Our entire family has embraced him (some to greater degrees than others). I signed up for a one day training and proceeded to have us evaluated by Pet Partners. Upon learning we passed, I began the process of becoming a volunteer at CHOC. Let's say it is comprehensive and thorough.

After four training visits, we are now awaiting our official 
orders for which day will be our regular time slot for 
brightening the day of the patients, parents and employees of this top-notch facility.

Reflecting upon these past several months, I see my path looks more like a meander through a meadow rather  
than a  journey on a straight path.  I am available and learning the art of flexibility. I chuckle at the Lord's gentle yet unrelenting pursuit to make me more like Him. I think of that 
beautiful worship song by Misty Edwards, "You Won't Relent Until You Have it All." The Lord ardently pursues us because he so loves us. 

 The question to ask ourselves is, "Are we playing hard-to-get"?

Extravagant

I have discovered Hobby Lobby since moving to California. I'm sure most of you are familiar with the, even if you have not visited one before; they are in the news due to their stance regarding biblical values on marriage.

 

Thursday evening as I browsed the aisles for a few remainng Easter items, I happened upon a sign-love extravagantly. I purchased it and promptly hung it in my powder room.

Two days later I participated in an outreach with a group of people from my church. We have been sowing into the people at two apartment complexes in our area for several months now. People recognized us and we knew some of them by name.

One boy, Richard, arrived a bit early for the egg hunt. When he asked for a sack for his eggs, I asked him his age. "Eleven" he answered. I told him the egg hunt was for ten and younger. "I'm nine" he laughingly stated.

Twenty minutes later, I gathered the children and explained the areas for the hunt. One of the assistant managers saw Richard and gave him "the look". He embarrassingly stepped away from the group.

A few hours later while returning to the gathering after dropping two of my children at home, I was prompted to reward Richard - I looked in my wallet, thinking I would give him five dollars. Since I had just went to the ATM, I only had twenty-dollar bills. Immediately the words from the sign hanging in my powder room flashed in front of my eyes. Then, in case I needed further confirmation, the words from Darryl Evans worship song, Your Love is Extravagant flooded my mind-
Your love is extravagant
Your friendship, it is intimate
I feel like moving to the rhythm of Your grace
Your fragrance is intoxicating in our secret place
Your love is extravagant

Was I willing to be extravagant with my money to demonstrate love to Richard? I pulled him aside and told him how honesty is a good thing, how we are to always tell the truth; then I put the money in his brown bag and walked away.  He smiled ear to ear!  At the end of the gathering, I asked him to tell me one thing he learned that day. "Honesty" he said.

Our Lord loves us extravagantly and unconditionally. He gave his life for us and our purpose in life is to bring him glory by allowing his Holy Spirit to flow through us into others, especially those who do not yet know him.

My challenge to us- In what areas are we stingy, holding on to something, refusing to give up our "rights"?

Our Lord's discipline is not condemning, yet convicting. Please hear the right voice if you experience something while reading. From the time we give our lives to Jesus, he is making us more like him. I was reminded today that many call him "Savior", but to whom is he truly "Lord" over their lives?

Not a popular idea in today's "I-can-do-what-I want" attitude.

We are highly valued and loved by the Father. May we choose to live each day fully surrendered to him.

Blessings,
Pattie
 

Divine Incidences

Divine appointments are similar in nature to Godincidences, God winks, and checks in your spirit. These Christianese terms all refer to ways that Christians feel like God is trying to steer us into a specific encounter or experience so that we can serve God or maybe play a part in the lives of other people-www.dictionaryofchristianese.com
Coincidence- a situation in which events happen at the same time in a way that is not planned or expected-www.merriam-Webster.com

The above definitions reflect similar thoughts about a topic all of us have experienced at one time or another. I choose to believe that our God, in his desire to let us know how much we are truly loved, arranges Godincidences in our lives.

Recently, I have experienced firsthand, several of these faith-occurrences. If you do not subscribe to this theory of God-inspired interactions in daily life, you may choose to not continue reading; if you are curious or need encouragement regarding this phenomenon, read on!

I have a dear friend from Hawaii and we spoke on the phone a few weeks back. In conversation, I mentioned I was in Chino Hills, CA for an afternoon. She asked if she had told me about her friend Norma, who also lives in Chino Hills. I told her no, she had not mentioned her to me before. She proceeds to tell me all about this woman and how we would be great friends. She went as far giving both me and Norma each other's  phone numbers.

We talked on the phone and became friends on Facebook (sounds so strange to see that in print-virtual friends with someone I have never met?). This past Friday we met for lunch and truly enjoyed getting to know each other.

The next day, while watching my son's soccer game, I see his girlfriend, her sister, and her mom (who live in Chino Hills) who came to watch the game. We're chatting and I mention that I met a new friend for lunch who also lives in Chino Hills. The mom asks me my friends name and I say, "Norma." Excitedly, she says, "Not Norma ---?" "Yes, that's her," I say.

Come to find out, my son's girlfriend's parents took a parenting class many years back at their church. Yes, Norma and her husband taught the classes! In fact, his girlfriend's parents went on to pair up with them and facilitate those same classes at the church. 

When I spoke with Norma Saturday evening, she was as surprised as I was at this 
"Godincident".  She thinks very highly of this family, which of course, blesses my heart (not 
that I didn't already know that).  I know the Lord used this to affirm the peace I have about their new, blossoming friend/relation-ship.

In case you're enjoying this, here is one more "Go God" incident.  While my friend was in town last month, we visited her aunt in Newport Beach-she invited us to her weekly bible study. At the end, one of the women, Rita, asks me if I craft. "I can copy" I tell her. She invites me to a monthly crafting time which meets in her garage. Two weeks ago, I attended (along with a dear friend and her mother-in-law) my first Women at the Cross gathering.

Being the first to arrive (no surprise if you know me😄), Rita showed us around her lovely, beach-cottage home, filled with love and many for crafts, photographs and projects. She told 
us how this group of women began meeting:  eight years ago, Rita's adult daughter was 
killed by a driver who was speeding. In the midst of her grief, she walked into her garage 


and began crying out to her Lord. The outcome of that time? A wooden cross, with shells glued onto it. This was the beginning of this powerful, regular meeting of Jesus-loving women of various ages and stages.

As I drove home during Friday traffic on I-5, tears rolled down my face; "Thank you, Jesus, for answering one of my prayers". Since moving back to Southern California, I have been praying and asking the Lord for friends. In every place we have lived, he has been faithful to provide godly, fun, passionate women in my life. That day I rejoiced again, as he has proven himself faithful. Thank you, Lord for Shannon, Jill, Amber, Lisa, Stacie, Odette, Jodi, Jody, Rebecca, Marcia, Mandy, and Cindy V.

Pattie

What's your State of Rest?

By the seventh day God had finished the work he had been doing; so on the seventh day he rested from all his work. Gen. 2:2

The fear of the Lord leads to life; then one rests content, untouched by trouble. Prov. 19:23

Spending time this past weekend at the foothills of the San Bernadino Mountains, surrounded by peace and God's amazing creation, prompted me to write about rest.

Much has been pondered, discussed and written about this concept which tends to elude us in our fast-driven, technology-based culture. I admit upfront I am not writing as someone who has overcome this challenge in my life. I'm laughing as I write this, as my dear friends know I am currently experiencing a season in which I awake during the middle of the night and cannot fall back to sleep. This results in my falling asleep at the most i opportune times, such as this 

weekend during an "untalent" show at a weekend retreat-snoring to 
boot!

What comes to mind when you read the word rest? Physical? Mental? Spiritual? All of the above are part of us, and in order to function and live significant lives, we need to intentionally incorporate practices that result in a rested mind, body, and soul.

 I am not addressing the mind and body aspects, as most of us are aware of, even if we do not practice disciplines that aid us in a healthy, rested body and clear mind.

Spiritual rest, however, is as important, I would argue-the most 
important aspect of a rested person. We know God instituted the Sabbath as a day of rest (Gen 2:2). We also know that everything 
"went to pot", as my darling daughter would say, after the Fall (Gen 3). We also know Jesus came first and foremost to save us from our sin, taking our place on the cross, in order that we could spend eternity with the Father; he also came to give us life-" I have come that they may have life, and Have it to the full" (John 10:10). He also gives us another reason for his coming in Matthew 11:28, " Come to me all you who are weary, and I will give you rest".

I challenge us to spend a few moments reflecting on our current 

state of restful or unrestfulness. If you are experiencing anxiety, fear, depression, or hopelessness, I implore you to seek the Lord 
regarding your lack of spiritual rest. The Holy Spirit plays many roles, one of which is comforter. Will you go to him, fully surrendered, 
desperate, even, and allow him to minister, guide and direct you to rest-in Him, on Him, and through Him?

Blessings
Pattie

Refreshed

22 Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail.  They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.  I say to myself, “The Lord is my portion;therefore I will wait for him.” Lamentations 3:22-24

I believe I am entering a new season in my walk with Jesus-walking with him the past twenty-something years has been amazing, sweet, challenging, life-altering.  I believe surrender is something all of us battle in varying degrees, as we walk with our Lord. 


For me, strong-willed, fiercely independent in some areas, and stubborn, this act of surrender has been wrought with many attempts and not much success upon first glance. However, each season has taught me something, whether it was joyous or difficult.

While at a beautiful day spa, Glen Ivy Hot Springs, with a friend, I noticed how some women exhibited an air of ... peace, confidence, freedom. Thinking about this later, I realized, " I want that!" At a birthday party for my thirty-year-old niece, I spoke with a woman in her mid-fifties. I mentioned my observation to her and she affirmed my thoughts. She said, "You get to the point where you don't care-about the wrinkles, what people think." 

Recently, I joined a group of women of various ages, to pray. As we sat in a circle sharing our praises and prayer requests, I realized with much gratefulness just what a blessing it was to be surrounded by these women, many of whom have weathered great trials, tragedies and joys during their journeys with Christ.  The verse in Titus cakes to mind, "Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God. Titus 2:3-5

Ladies who are followers of Jesus, I exhort you to pray and ask the Lord to reveal to you who he would have you to mentor and who is the mentor in your life? These relationships need not be formal, yet they are imperative to maturity in Christ.  Involvement in this kind of relationship has many benefits, one of which is it helps to keep us accountable. We think a bit more seriously about our actions, comments and behaviors when we know we are in the privileged position to speak into someone else's life. 

I am honored the Lord has allowed me various opportunities in recent years to speak to women regarding parenting, homeschooling, discipline, or relational challenges. I take seriously the responsibility and receive much joy walking alongside others.

May you experience a closer walk with Jesus as he uses you to speak life and his truths into the lives of others.

Pattie

New Year, New Season

New Year, New Season

In the past month, a few people inquired about my blog-was I still writing? How come they have not seen posts for a while?  I wish I had reason or could answer that I was engaged in something.... excitng, new, or challenging. Nope.

The honest response is I felt inadequate and not sure of myself. Midlife crisis? I don't think so; more like an identity crisis. For the past nineteen years, my primary calling (aside from my role as a wife for the past twenty-three) has been mother, with the last fifteen also including "homeschool" mom.

That has shifted in the past year-and-a-half. At the completion of this school year, my three older boys will have all graduated high school. My daughter is in public school, leaving me with my seventh grader, who will likely join his sister when he starts high school the year after next.

Our moves to Reno and Honolulu occurred while my children were young. This provided me with a natural in, opportunities to connect with other moms and their children. In both areas the Lord provided support and community for us. 

This move has proved most challenging to me. With older kids, I am no longer arranging play dates. We are not part of a co-op setting as in the past, thus 
losing some of the camaraderie that accompanies homeschooling through the trenches with others. 

One would think that with more time during my day, I would be meeting with Jesus daily, unhurriedly, with intimate devotional time each day. Nope.  I have allowed one of my passions to monopolize my time-reading.

Please hear me-reading is great. I have been a bookworm ever since I learned to read at the age of five. I lived across the street from a library which called my name and was also air conditioned (eascoast summers are quite humid and we cooled off with box fans and cold drinks). I realize that it has become an idol and needs to resume its rightful place in my life.

I am sure that the distance from God I have felt is directly related to the irregularity in my devotional time with him. A favorite pastor of mine says, "One day a week with God makes one weak". He also says, "How much of God do you have in your life? As much as you want of him." I am not suggesting this is THE marker of one's relationship with the Lord. For me, a time set apart, before 

starting my day, centers me, refreshing and refilling me with his Spirit so I am equipped and prepared to face the day. 

Knowing I did not want this season to continue, I prayed, asking the Lord to meet me and draw me closer to him. The other day I happened upon an online bible study, Loving God Greatly. I joined and the eight-week session starts 
today. The scripture memorization for the week is John 15:4, "Remain in me, as I also remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me." The Lord gently reminded me of my incredible need for him and how it is his desire for me to bear fruit.

I rejoice and shout for all to hear:  "And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus (Phil. 4:19)." 

What Matters

What Matters

Love The Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind, and love your neighbor as yourself. Luke 10:27

And what does The Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God. Micah 6:8

Getting sidetracked can occur so quietly, unintentionally; blindsiding us. At one point we realize, "Man, I have strayed off the path, letting minor things become major ones, causing havoc within my family."

The above verses center me, reminding me of what truly matters. 

I want to emphasize the things that can distract us are not "bad" things. They can include but are not limited to character training, manners, chores, serving others, sports, hobbies, lessons, to name a few.

Thankfully, our Lord is forgiving, compassionate and merciful (Lam. 3:22). Throughout this past week he has shown me what matters by giving me glimpses into my childrens' character.

Nonchalantly, one son tells me he and his sister are home a bit later than usual from youth group because they stopped to move a lady's car out of the road; when they learned she was out of gas, they gave her five dollars.

Another son willingly drove me and his brother out forty minutes to a camp, and back, (I woke him up and he had five minutes to get ready) because I had something in my eye and was not comfortable driving. Then he asked if he could buy me coffee. While in line he said we should bring one home for his sister too.

Our neighbor's granddaughter was celebrating her ninth birthday. When my daughter learned she didn't have plans for the day, she announced she was riding with her on our tandem bike to Mc Donald's to buy her lunch.

The same girl was blessed by my son who dropped a birthday card with ten dollars in it at her front door (didn't even put his name on it)!

When we cry out to God for help, he answers. He is faithful, always. I was so frustrated that my kids were not consistent with completing their chores. On several occasions a full on meltdown occurred!

Yet, when I sought The Lord, he chose to answer by showing me what matters-would I rather have kids who do their chores regularly and not reach out to bless others, or kids who give of themselves to others and not unload the dishwasher everyday?  On some days my actions and words would demonstrate I chose the former. 

Our God is the God of second and third chances. Today I choose to focus on what truly matters.

Surrender

Surrender

Vulnerability is scary-writing your thoughts, emotions, beliefs on a public forum for all to see. Yikes!

Yet recently, the Lord has reaffirmed to me that he is all about relationships-first and foremost, he desires relationship with us. Second, he cares about our relationships with others. John 13:34 says, " A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another." Because he is wise and knows our human nature intimately, he accepts us where we are at when we say yes to his call, surrendering our lives to him. However, he does not leave us there.A few verses that pop out to me are:

 1 Peter 1:15-16: But just as he who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do;  for it is written: “Be holy, because I am holy.”
Romans 6: 18-19: You have been set free from sin and have become slaves to righteousness.  I am using an example from everyday life because of your human limitations. Just as you used to offer yourselves as slaves to impurity and to ever-increasing wickedness, so now offer yourselves as slaves to righteousness leading to holiness.
Hebrews 12:14:  Make every effort to live in peace with everyone and to be holy; without holiness no one will see the Lord.

I love how the Lord brings us into new seasons, places burdens upon our hearts. Holiness seems to be what he is impressing upon me presently. I heard a man speak on holiness last night. One thing has remained with me-"We are set apart unto God; not only separated from sin, but also set apart so we can give him everything. God requires 100% from us because he gave 100%, his own son, for us!"  

When we think of holiness, often a list of do's and don'ts come to mind. In some aspects of life, people expect and accept it. When on a sports team, one must meet requirements as well as follow the rules, the underlying thought being the athlete's and team's well-being. 

When it comes to spiritual matters. however, people do not like being told what to do and what not to do. Personally, I think our flesh cringes at the idea of obedience, submission and surrender. Only when we know the character of God and the heart of his son Jesus can we surrender, knowing everything is related to his love for us. The bible is God's love story to us. He created us; he knows us; he loves us. The commands and warnings he gives us are because of his love for us. The things he warns us about are not good for us.

After his relationship with us, God cares about our relationship with others. In fact,  he created the institution of the family. Thankfully, through his word and his Spirit he provides us with the tools to love each other, which includes the children he has given us.

No matter the stage of parenting, I need Jesus. I cannot lean on my own understanding (Prov. 3:5-6). Knowing his Holy Spirit resides in me gives me  assurance and hope.  No matter my former ways, I can choose to put on the full armor of God (Eph. 6:10-17). I can trust that The Lord will work through me, empowering me to exhibit  love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, and self-control toward my children. Again, surrender is the key. 
I need to trust his will for my day, giving him my schedule, lists and time.

I challenge you to surrender those areas you may be holding on to closely. I guarantee he will multiply your time, allowing you to accomplish all he has for you each day. This is easier said than done (until we remember he loves, loves, loves us). Like anything else, it takes practice. I encourage you to seek the Lord regarding your present circumstances.

He really will show you how to do the difficult with joy so you can reflect him to your children.

Pursued or Pursuing?

While talking with a friend this past week, one of our topics of conversation centered around the idea of roles people adopt when friends with someone- pursued or pursuer?

She believes most people are pursued, meaning they are most comfortable being on the receiving end of gestures and other words or actions that keep the relationship going. They are the ones reached out to, called, texted, etc.

Obviously some people are pursuers, the ones to initiate and maintain friendships. They are the first to call, make plans, keep in touch with others.

Friendships are precious gifts from God.

-Prov. 18:24:  A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.

-Prov. 17:17:  A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.

Personality traits (introvert or extrovert), personal experience, current life experiences, as well as spiritual maturity, all affect how people interact with others.

Having moved just a year ago, friendships are a high priority for me. Recently, interactions with two new women in my life have reinforced the idea of intentionality and its role in friendships.

After talking with my friend, I texted one of the women and told her how I  appreciated  her checking in with me each week to see if I was going to the beach. She laughed and said before she knew Jesus she was bad at staying connected with others; in fact, she still struggles but was encouraged by my perspective of her. 

I have realized that pursuing friendships is something of value to me and to 
God. In John 13:34 Jesus says, “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know 
that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”

Regardless of my bent or any of the items listed above, Jesus commands me to love others. When I am walking in the Spirit rather than the flesh, this occurs more often, resulting in love, whether I am on the giving or receiving end of it.

When I get off course, I am reminded of how God pursued me. 1 John 4:19 says, "We love because he first loved us." Not only did God send his son to die 
for me and make me righteous, he also continues to pursue me, daily, through his word and his Holy Spirit.

What does this mean to me as a mom? I am to pursue relationships with my children. If you are a mom to young children, this may sound strange to you-they are always with me; how could I ever have to pursue them? In fact, I would relish the opportunity to be away long enough to be pursued :)

If you are a parent of teens or older, maybe this makes a lot of sense to you. One thing I would like to do this summer is learn my kids' love language. The Five Love Languages ( also one is available geared to teens)  by Gary Chapman is an excellent book on this topic.

One of my goals this summer is to learn my kids' love languages. I desire to communicate to them that they matter, that I love them. 

I encourage you to be a pursuer-of God first and foremost, and to others. It is a worthy investment.

Pattie